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trying to satisfy you is a herculean feat this is not how I wanted to start out this poem intentional lawnmowering start up hover over why don’t you today, this morning, for you to get gang green face is blue getting cold imagined I vomited in the kitchen floor fell and passed out on my…… Continue reading untitled

soon c. will be off on another trip and I will be alone with the cats I’ll try to make the best of my time but can already feel things getting lonelier the sun is bright my soup is gone emptied from washed out cup at the sink and cleaned off spoon rinsed under running…… Continue reading small notes pt. 2

there are nine writing utensils on my desk most of them pens some pencils and an electronic pen used like a mouse plugged into the side of the keyboard I am getting ready to have some soup for lunch my phone is turned on counting down my minutes as a free man I hope desperately…… Continue reading small notes pt. 1

I’ve not really written for days. My hands have been moving, but something isn’t in it. My heart is not in it. And now I’m back from West Virginia. I kind of gave that holiday away to the relatives; I’ll claim New Year’s and the weekend as my own. It is good to be out…… Continue reading a few words

I don’t get off to a good start writing this so throw it all in the bag and give the world something less private less neurotic less dirty-laundry I straight hate going to see them and no matter what day is no goddamn exception are you obsessed with agonizing over it I am because you…… Continue reading late

eating. we are going to eat at the Indian restaurant today. are psyched it’s open. gmother suggested this in the first place, since she is going more deaf and more blind, to go, and she would reimburse us. a day later, she has my mother call: “she wants to know what she can make.” nothing!…… Continue reading Untitled

for me, having to go see “the family” on the holidays, puts a strange twist on enjoying the holidays. it is like going to work, but you can lounge more, and be more sarcastic. sarcasm is the saving grace this fine day, and I plan to indulge. in other news, dreamt I was in my…… Continue reading xmas morning notes

fragments, these days that pass, cold days. sitting in the co-op without anything to write with, mentally I think out the words: december depression. december exhaustion. december depletion. december hard times. december hard to see a light at the end of the tunnel. I’m reading a book on increasing reading speed and comprehension, therefore giving…… Continue reading december oblations

hatred of all things good and pure. is that how things are starting out? rushing headlong into a dark cave, only to be attacked by . . . assist me in lying in bed and dreaming heavily, being fully present. assist me in being there to hear, respond to little vocalizations. each extension is everything…… Continue reading assist me in being there to hear, respond to little vocalizations

there’s this picture of you posing something. I’m 1 for guessing away all the time of a dull day. I think you don’t like your picture taken. can understand that because my nature is shy at times, but also feel identities need along with them built in technologies that preserve them. this is flex of…… Continue reading identities need along with them built in technologies that preserve them