an eon later,
entry try again
so I’ve
returned
from a trip
to WV
a funeral
and am
somehow
in good spirits
I guess because I’m glad to be home
in the meantime I wiped out several
days of writing by accident
but somehow
I’m in good spirits
ready to write more
a friend briefly chatted me about the SDG falldown. upset, he wanting to know my take on it. SDG, in case you don’t know, is a holy monk I followed as my guru when I was involved in the Krsna movement some time back. well, news has come out that a year ago he became romantically involved over time with a lady who was his therapist. finally he admitted this to the board of monk directors, but clarifying that it was not physically sexual. still, he has been tormented over this. his lifelong vow, after all, was one of celibacy never to be broken. the track mark in his eyes, and in the eyes of his followers, is no longer spotless.
I suppose this can be quite a blow to one’s faith when holding on to such an idea that this person, this guru figure, is supposed to be absolutely perfect. but that’s just not me any more. I frankly said, I’m not looking to follow anyone… the rules are too rigid… the society is just another government… I don’t need a new set of parents… I don’t need to be kept in an imaginary guilt…
do what you you gotta do, I said to my friend, to feel healthy. that’s it. if you feel healthy, mentally and physically, that’s all you need. the saying goes: “judge a tree by its fruit.” spirituality does not require life-long prison cells of celibacy. over time, I grew to love SDG as a gentle person, one of incredible intellect, a true wordsmith, and so on. that is why, to me, he is still holy, and to be respected from the get go.
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