I thought of, and wrote, all this “brilliant” and inspiring stuff on the train. or at least it was an idea to give me that drive. my theme is be nice. be human. don’t let the wrecked world wreck you. I was in a bad mood and quite tired, but opened up my writing and started reading over what I wanted to perform and put down a few words in my notebook:
“I’m going out into the dark world with some hope that I’ll survive, that I can be just the slightest bit comfortable there, that I can have a good time. I don’t want to be miserable.”
quite a smokey place, and my eyes were stinging like a bitch, but the crowd was really sweat and accepting of me. Marisa, in my opinion, performed the best piece of her career tonight, and it’s only two days old. that’s the best thing; when you’re churning out new stuff, it’s a great feeling.
things went quite well, despite a woman getting up and ranting about how we should get up there and be “committed,” whatever the hell that meant. I don’t know if it was directed towards me – I understand her point – but if I want to apologize for my stuff in the future, I’m gonna shove it down some throats. because that’s what they want right? confident apologies. that’s what I’m talking about. keepin’ it real.
and she kind of ran it into the ground. but it was all right ultimately.
Elise said she felt sorry for me because I hate my job so much. but I’ve been hating jobs for years now, I don’t think too much is going to change. now I’m just going in and letting all that abuse roll off my back. I’m like that stuff you put on your car – raindance. I’m not going anywhere. bring it on.
eyes sore, throat sore, throat just gone. thanks to everyone who took the time out to talk with me and encourage my efforts in writing.
Sean McCabe of Ink and Dagger passed away last week . . . I’ve never met him, but have always heard good things about him, that he was brilliant, and I even based one of my characters on him. I’m sorry to hear of this death.
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