afternoon time. I hardly write at this time, mostly because I feel like I should be doing something else. but this is productive too. if no one wants to give me work right now, it’s not the end of the world. so I tell myself. I have to remind myself of all the important things. I’ve been reading the Koran. I have good solace in that. these are the personal pleasures in life which no company should invalidate.
I went to this job interview the other day that turned out merely to be a seminar. I was pretty upset. another multi-level marketing scheme. they gave this formulated speech and tried to rope everyone in. here I was walking into the office expecting to sit down and talk with the big boss about how much I had to offer, etc., and the next thing I know I’m sitting in the back row with a lemon faced expression. for some reason I sat through the whole thing. by the end I was still not getting anything out of it, and I slipped by. I could tell it was a rip off. you become a salesman for their company, and it’s easy. sure it is. when they’re trying to rip you off, they’re always so vague. ripping off your time.
I want a job where I don’t have to talk to people much. I want to mind my own business and not be in the center of a stock market crash. I want to concentrate on prayer and the higher things all throughout my day, and I don’t think I should be faulted for that. others, they work their stressful jobs and return home to the television relaxing alpha state and get in a grove. they believe everything they see on Entertainment Tonight, and care about every single outfit the stars are wearing. fucking forget it.
people decorate everything around them and think that as long as they’re moving, they’re getting somewhere. they’re simply creating a whirlwind of ash all around them. I choke in that space they create. it’s like they want it to expand. they have no concept of a personal zone. selfishness to fill a house, fill a building, fill whatever it takes. there is not enough room in this town for the two of us. these cowboys on a mission from ego.
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