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hot hot weather down here. also, to go in a mini-mart or laundromat around here, you get another dose of the south. they love smoking cigarettes indoors. incredible.

this morning I layed back on the floor and with the side of my head I slightly tapped my 20 lb. weight. if I would have thrown myself down out of exhaustion, and hit my head like that at high speed, my brains would have been all over the carpet. I could go at any time.

with others patience is tested. I feel small because of it. well, it makes me just feel like hell, because there are much better things to think about. I wish I just didn’t think about it or talk about it, but it’s there and it has me, for now.

question. do you have little on your mind? do you only think of yourself? how do you treat others? how do you treat yourself? do you poison yourself? do you lie, do you steal, do you fault everyone around you and never see their true worth? can you see your own faults? is your stomach full of soda? what’s in your lungs? do you try to run overtop? do you kill animals and insects? do you kill people? do you only wait for your turn to speak? do you rush along in your life and create drama so you don’t get bored? when’s the last time you sat by yourself for ten minutes in absolute silence on purpose and liked it? what do you talk about? is from here to the mailbox a long walk for you?