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the sky is blue and purple and smothered green. pain shoots through the nerves. the agonizing sound of their voices. patience just wears through till it pours. eyes water. check yourself into one of those places where they file you away. one meal a day. eyes water more. to a puddle. chew slowly. pray. who else are you going to talk to. no one should be interested in me . . . let me let you finish your dinner. after dinner reading session consists of the xian saints. in school we would draw on desks, leave notes for the other kids, cheat tests, marker up walls, kick stuff over, sneak out through the cut chain link fence. and we thought that was prison. you should see this shit.